Do you want to know the top divorce mistakes to avoid? Read this to discover mistakes to avoid while filing for divorce!
No happy couple gets married with a divorce in mind, so it’s easy to feel lost when you’re in it. Studies show that over 40-50% of married couples in the US file for divorce. This process is one of the most painful experiences you can encounter in your life.
It can feel unfair to deal with financial and practical decisions while under the emotional distress that divorce brings. That’s why we created this guide about the most common mistakes to avoid when filing for divorce. Read on to learn more.
Forgetting to Change Your Will
Filing for divorce will often come with estate planning, but it does not revoke the terms of your will. It remains valid, but your partner will be treated as though they died when you divorced. This can impact any inheritance you planned for.
Your ex-spouse can also claim financial provisions, which will force you to pay your ex-spouse. The best thing you can do is to write a new will. This ensures that your ex-spouse has no claim on your estate or anything else you have in your will.
Unfortunately, if you pay maintenance, this can be a little trickier. Talk to your lawyer and make your will as flexible as possible. This will prepare your executors to protect your beneficiaries.
Treating Divorce as a Form of Revenge
People choose to divorce for many reasons. Some of the most common include extramarital affairs, financial trouble, or constant bickering. Others see it as a way out of a toxic, abusive relationship.
It isn’t uncommon to feel anger or to blame your ex for your situation. Regardless of how you feel or the reason behind your separation, you must never treat divorce as a way to take revenge against your ex-partner. While it may give you some satisfaction, you’ll realize that it doesn’t last very long.
Using the court to get revenge can be costly, especially if you try to prolong the case. You may lose assets that would have otherwise gone to you if you hadn’t lost them to legal expenses.
Talking Bad About Your Ex to Your Kids
It’s normal to feel hurt, angry, betrayed, or frustrated during a divorce. If anything, it’s healthy to go through these emotions. However, whatever you’re feeling, you must never take it out on your kids.
Rant to your family and friends, but never to your children. You can also consult a therapist to help you manage these emotions.
Bad-mouthing your ex to your kids will only hurt them. Children often feel like they’re losing a parent when they first learn their parents are divorcing. Talking about your ex can also impact your custody case.
Letting Your Emotions Drive You
Making emotionally charged decisions is never smart when you’re going through a divorce. You will need to make some difficult choices about your kids, home, and other assets. It’s essential to stay rational during these moments.
Allowing your emotions to drive your decisions can impact you later on. A divorce should be a clean process – a way for couples to be at peace as individuals, so don’t make it harder on yourself.
It may feel difficult to face your ex-partner, especially if they wronged you. However, communication will help you both reach the best possible settlement agreement. You may even get some closure along the way and learn to forgive the other and yourself for your shortcomings during the relationship.
Fighting for Assets You Can’t Afford
One of the first major decisions you have to make as a soon-to-be-divorced couple is who gets to keep the family home. Some individuals may have an emotional attachment, while others fight for it simply because of pride. Regardless of your reasoning, it’s essential to consider if you can even afford it.
Assess your finances and ask yourself if you can afford a house buyout. This may require you to trade other assets or look into other financing options. There are also upkeep costs, like utility bills and mortgages.
It helps to have a financial advisor on your side to help you make informed decisions.
Failing to Comply With Court Orders
Complications after a divorce will only follow if you don’t comply with court orders. After the divorce, the court will issue orders concerning custody, alimony, and child support. Make sure to understand and remember these and follow them.
Failure to do so can only succeed in losing any leverage or ground you had in your case. It could also result in legal complications, which will only cost more financially and emotionally.
If you feel like the orders aren’t fair, talk to your divorce attorney. They will help you get in contact with the judge to see if they can modify the order.
Not Getting a Divorce Attorney
While any lawyer can represent you, it’s best to get an experienced divorce attorney. A divorce attorney is well-versed in all the legal issues concerning divorce. Divorce can be pretty complex from a legal perspective.
A divorce attorney can shine a light on all the little details you may not be familiar with. In addition to the emotional stress, you also have to deal with deadlines and paperwork. If you miss a deadline or forget about a specific document, it could impact the outcome of your case.
A divorce attorney can help you ensure that you’ve met all the requirements. They will also protect your rights as a parent and as an individual.
Not Considering Divorce Mediation
Mediation allows you to settle your divorce issues without the court battle. You can avoid legal negotiations and keep the stress level low. If you have kids, mediation is often the best course of action.
It gives you the chance to collaborate with your partner, so you can do what’s best for your family. In some cases, mediation can help you reach a compromise faster. Courthouse divorces can take up to months or years to complete.
Avoid These Mistakes When Filing for Divorce
Filing for divorce can be messy and difficult, but it doesn’t have to be. Regardless of the reason for your divorce, mediation can help you reach an outcome that is fair and amicable for all.
FairWell Family Mediation will help you through your family law matters. Contact us today to learn more.